A farmer may make a mistake and plant his peas crookedly; the peas make no mistake, but come up and show his line – Ralph Waldo Emerson
You are accountable for your own life. I am accountable for mine. Good, bad, successful, unsuccessful, happy or sad, fair or unfair, you own your life. You are accountable; you have always been accountable; and you will always be accountable. That’s just the way it is.
This is not a proposition that is “generally true.” It’s always true. You create the results in your life, not some of the time, but all of the time. If you don’t like your job, you are accountable. If your relationships are on the rocks, you are accountable. If you are overweight, you are accountable. If you are addicted to drugs, you are accountable. If you are an alcoholic, you are accountable. If you are angry, you are accountable. If you are not happy, you are accountable. If you are insesure, you are accountable. Whatever your circumstance is, if you want to change it, you cannot dodge your responsibility to make it better.
By convincing yourself that you are a victim, you are guaranteed to have no progress, no healing, and no victory. If you continue to cling to the belief that you are “right” so the problem can’t be your fault, you will never create lasting change in yourself. Your flight from personal responsibility will prevent you from putting the bit in your mouth, yanking the reins, and going to work on controlling your life and actions.
Bottom line: You are not a victim. You are creating the situations you are in; you are creating the emotions that flow from these situations. This is not theory; it is life. The solution is within you – not in others.
Man up. Own the choices you have made. Own the behaviors that you live by. Sure, it’s easier to tell yourself that bad things are you parents’ fault, your teachers’ fault, the result of bad luck, or some kind of cosmic conspiracy against you. It’s easier to make someone else responsible - other than yourself – that way you don’t have to require anything of yourself, because you are a victim.
If you are an adult, and you live independently, free from dementia, a brain tumor, or some other involuntary disruption of thinking, then you are accountable.
You cannot change what you do not acknowledge. Let today be a huge wake-up call for you.