This Sunday....

1.  Time Change this weekend.  Set your clock FORWARD one hour Saturday night.

2.  Message title:  "Good Employees, Bad Teachers, Contentment, and the Love of Money" from I Timothy 6.

Learning to Let Go

Without question, some of the best things I have done for myself in the last couple of years have been to (1) Develop new hobbies and outside interests, (2) Establish a lot of margin, and, (3) Have a life outside of work.

These three simple steps have resulted in less stress, less worry, and less fatigue for me.  I can’t tell you how liberating it has been.  The weight of worry has dropped off me like a ton of bricks.    The inside erosion that has been my constant companion for years is a thing of the past.  I no longer feel like I am drowning.

Sometimes we get so busy rowing the boat that we don’t take time to stop and see where we’re going… or what we’re becoming.  The ministry can be all-consuming at times – worrying about people, making ends meet, putting out brush fires, pouring myself into others, trying to fix the unfixable – and it can lead to burnout or an emotional breakdown.

I’ve let go.

I’ve let myself off-the-hook by refusing to take ownership for everything that happens.  I've given myself permission to not feel guilty for being unable to fix everything or failing to meet the expectations of so many people.  Now, I just let most things play-out how they will, and wa-la!, the world doesn’t end... and neither does PCC. 

With so much margin (i.e., a life outside of work - and learning to let go)  I don’t feel the need to quit, jump ship, leave the ministry, or find new friends to get a fresh start.  I’ve learned to deal with it right here.

It's-Pure-freedom.

Nowadays I’m focusing more time and attention upon myself, staying emotionally and physically healthy.  Plus, I’m devoting more time to my family.

Life is good.

Thankful

It’s not Thanksgiving, but I wanted to list a few things I’m thankful for today:

Second chances and forgiveness.  There have been times when I thought my life was over, but God the Redeemer wasn’t done.  I’m thankful there is nothing too big for God’s grace to handle.  We serve the God of second chances.

My Family.  They mean everything to me.  I have thirty-one years of marriage under my belt; two grown sons whom I’m proud of; a daughter-in-law I adore; a new grandson that is a pure delight; a great upbringing by my parents; a father in heaven; a mother who still serves Christ and attends PCC; and a sister who I have always been very close to.  These are the people I am closest to.

Pace Community Church.  I’ve invested 15 years of my life into this work and this flock of sheep.  It’s been a great journey.  I raised my kids in this church.  Some people have been with us since the beginning and continue with us still.  That means a lot to me.  I love the self-sacrificing servants of PCC too; without them our church would not be possible.  We have a great church, and I happen to think it’s one of the best in the area.  I love our church for another reason – there are so many happy people in our congregation who are satisfied with their church and its leadership – some 400 of them.  Such people are pure gold.

The local church.  A lot of people are cynical about the local church, but I love the church, even with all her scrapes and bruises, and imperfections.  Little churches with steeples and fancy mega churches with bands… they all matter.

My friends.  I have a lot of friends; casual friends, close friends, confidants, familiar friends, buddies, hang-out pals, fishing buddies, and inner-circle friends.  It makes for a full life. They are not perfect people; they are regular people, just people like me.  Most importantly, they give me enormous amounts of grace overlooking my imperfections.  Also, they don't have unrealistic expectations of me as a pastor - their expectations are "right sized."   As the Bible says, "love covers a multitude of sins."  We don’t pretend to have it all together, so are free to admit to one other that we don’t hit a double or triple every time at bat.  But we DO grow together as a band of brothers as we progressively turn from sin and closer to God.  And BTW, I experience more spiritual growth when I am with people like this, (i.e., safe people), just hanging out, having coffee, sharing dinner, or frying fish… than I can sitting in a circle with strangers, pretending to be pious and going through the motions of fake accountability.

Life is good.

8 Tips for When You Are Falsely Accused

1.  Accept that there is no way to erase what has happened.  The situation is real, so get out of denial about it in order to deal with it.

2.  Watch your catastrophic language.  If you keep saying words like “horrible” and “devastated” and “my life is ruined” you add to the stress.  Put things in perspective.  An innocent child in a burn unit is facing a horrible, devastating tragedy.  Perhaps your situation isn’t as bad.  Change your internal dialogue, and you will feel better.

3.  Rebuild your reputation, beginning with your inner circle.  Start with family, close friends, working your way outward.  Make sure they know the truth.  When your inner circle knows the truth, they will go out into the world with the truth creating a ripple effect.  You don’t need to talk about this for the rest of your life, but for those in your immediate circle and in this immediate time, you need to step up and tell them the truth.

4.  Don’t try to address every accusation.  If you decide to start defending yourself, that will become your full-time job.  If you answer every story, every piece of gossip, every allegation against you, that’s all you’ll ever do.  You will be completely consumed by this and it will take over your life.

5.  Stop reacting to rumors.  You give it legs by reacting to it.  Don’t draw attention to yourself by defending against the rumor.  Give yourself permission to just live your life.  If there are people who talk poorly about you, then those won’t be your friends.  There will be other people who will like and respect you for who you are, and they will be your friends.

6.  Stand up for yourself by saying, “I’m taking my power back.  I’m not going to give them the power of pick away at my feelings.  They’re wrong and I can look in the mirror.  I have nothing to hide.”  You need to walk forth from the situation.

7.  Don’t fall into the trap of taking out your frustration on those closest to you.  The stress that comes with being falsely accused can lead to outbursts of anger towards a spouse or child.  The enemy isn’t your loved one; it’s an outside force.

8.  Remember that this event will not last forever.  People will forget and move on.  A new drama will eventually take the spotlight from you.

Sunday Mind Dump - March 3, 2013

Another great day at PCC.

Attendance was a bit off - mostly small children and thsoe who are sick.

Really enjoyed the content of today's message regarding pastors (elders, church leaders) and how they are to be treated.  I think it was eye-opening for some people.  A lot of people found it  interesting too...  to be given a peek into the life & role of pastors.  I was pretty transparent at times.

My laptop comupter at home got another virus yesterday (Saturday), so I'm wrting right now from the office.  I will be not be online for a day or two.

Wish I could write more, but I've been invited to lunch with a group.

Sunday is always the high-point of my week.

Blessings...

It's Friday Night....

It's Friday night and I am perfectly content to be at home.  The simple things in life (like home, family, and friends) are the things that make life real and meaningful.  Besides, this easy chair is a lot more comfortable than being stuck in traffic.

Sunday's Sermon

I.   Elders - how to select them

II.  Wine - a little for the stomach

III. Restoring Fallen Leaders

Ready to Plant

Tomatoes, peppers, squash, and cucumber.  Most of these are ready to plant, but I'm waiting to get past the last frost date (which, for this area averages between March 11-20.  We're in zone 8b). 

What Kind of Pastor is Best: A Shepherd or an Overseer?

Recognizing this is an over-simplification, there are two basic kinds of pastors:  Shepherds with high mercy gifts and Overseers who watch over and direct the work of others.

Shepherds with strong mercy gifts are oriented towards being the primary care-giver to their congregations; almost like a Chaplain.  They are the ones doing all the teaching, all the funerals, all the weddings, all the visitation, all the discipling, and late-night phone calls.  They lead all the prayer groups, Bible studies, pot-lucks, and gatherings of any kind.  They know everyone by name, including the kids – sometimes even the pets.  They go to graduations, attend recitals, and remember birthdays.  In some instances there is a certain mystique that surrounds them, being perceived as the holy man who is the only one experienced enough to do such things.  However, there is a limit to how many people one man can personally care for.  Consequently, the church can never grow beyond that limit.

Overseers, on the other hand, are oriented towards ensuring their sheep are properly cared for by a group of shepherds, or under-shepherds, who are able to provide such ministry to a broader range of people.  Overseers are leaders of leaders.  They are willing to share the ministry with others.  They do some of the shepherding themselves (possessing a pastors heart) but give up most of it to others so more ministry can take place.  It’s really quite simple: more shepherds translates into more ministry, which equals more needs being met, which equals more kingdom impact and a broader ministry.

Let’s make a case for the Overseer for a moment:

In the OT, God clearly put Moses into such a role.  When Moses tried to do everything himself, arbitrating each and every situation as a solo Shepherd, he was unable to keep up with the demands.  He eventually reached a place of fatigue and burnout.  Furthermore, a lot of people were neglected because of his limitations as a one-man leader.  And, the people suffered for it.

It took the wisdom of his father-in-law, Jethro, employing the skills of an Overseer, to organize captains of fives, captains of tens, and captains of fifties to care for the people.

In the NT, the Holy Spirit birthed the Church by dropping 3,000 new converts into the laps of eleven very overwhelmed men.  It was a mega church mess if there ever was one.  It wasn’t long before the apostles realized they needed to pursue the role of Overseers while setting apart deacons for most of the shepherding tasks, (taking care of widows and running the food-distribution program).

The point is:  both Shepherds and Overseers are needed in churches

A hard working Shepherd can care for around seventy-to-eighty people.  If that pastor doesn’t bring in other Shepherds or under-shepherds and become a leader of leaders, he will become a bottleneck for ministry and growth.

Coincidentally, the average size of a typical church is around seventy-to-eighty people.  Hmmmm…

At Pace Community Church, we had 75 people at our first service.  That means the church outgrew me day one.  I had two choices:  I could operate as a Shepherd-pastor to the congregation (and probably remain at that size or lower); or I could learn a new set of skills and become an Overseer, ensuring that everyone was cared for – not only by me, but by others too – spreading the ministry around – and thereby positioning our church for more ministry and greater kingdom impact.

I decided to devote myself to becoming an Overseer.  And we grew.

It wasn’t easy.  Most who enter the ministry are, by nature, Shepherds with a shepherd’s heart and prefer to operate solo. 

And being a Shepherd (Chaplain to everyone) is appealing.  You get to be at the center of almost everything that’s going on.  You are the one at the hospital, at the wedding, drying the tears, holding the hand, and leading them to Christ.  You are the one doing all the baptizing, baby dedications, and administering communion.  You are the one who chairs every meeting and leads the charge to take every hill.  You are the “man of God”, the theological expert, and the reservoir of all wisdom.  And the accolades you receive from being solo are intoxicating.

Not so much for the Overseer.  You have to be willing to let go… to let others get the credit, see others take the hill, let others be praised.  You are not at the center of every life-event in the lives of those you love.  Instead, you hear stories of people praising a counselor, a Bible class teacher, another ministry leader, their small group leader, or a staff member.  Others get to make decisions, lead teams, do ministry, and share some of the light.

That was my journey. 

Yet, I'm the better for it... and so is PCC.

So why give up Shepherding in favor of Overseeing?  Simple.  Based on Romans 12:8, if you have the gift of leadership, you are called to lead.  And that’s what an Overseer does:  he is a leader of leaders.  Following Paul's advice to Timothy, a pastor has to train, select, and appoint others to carry out the volume of work.

In Scripture, both Shepherds and Overseers are needed.  The goal is not less care, but assured care.  Multiple ministers can do more than one minister.  It's as simple as that.

Sunday Mind Dump - Feb 24, 2013

Hands down, it was one of my favorite services.

Things were just clicking, and that is always a good thing.

Attendance was way up, there was strong energy in the service, the call to worship was well-done, and the music was exceptional.  Everything was very uplifting.

I just love seeing all the young couples and families attending PCC.  It seems like there are more than ever before right now.

This is very, very exciting for me.

I met two new couples this morning – the men are flight students – both in the Marines.  Great people.

This morning’s message was about how to treat elderly men… younger men… older women… younger women… and widows in the church.  Really enjoyed it.

We have been very blessed with some very talented musicians and singers at PCC.

The weather this afternoon was splendid.  This is why we live in NW Florida.

Do you ever look around at the people in your life and realize that you are surrounded by some great people?  If you can do that, you are fortunate beyond measure.

Hosted our 201 seminar tonight.  We had a very good turnout.  Everyone really seemed to enjoy the event.  Also had a great team of people who prepared the meal.  All around a great day.

Forgot to take pictures. 

Tomorrow is day 21 of my intermittent fasting.  My body is beginning to adapt and it’s getting easier.  Almost feels like a new normal.  Weight drop has finally started – it took a couple of weeks to see movement on the scale.

It’s 10:20 p.m.  I’ve been at it all day long.  Time to call it a wrap.